Week 6:1 Rigid Role Relations

In learning about rigid role relations in Chapter 6 on Interpersonal Communications, I started to think of my own relationships and how the patterns apply. Out of a rigid complementarity, competitive symmetry, and submissive symmetry, I think the competitive symmetry would be the most difficult to change. Competition is natural in some people and it is very unlikely you will be able to adjust a personality of that sort. If someone is determined they are right, it doesn't matter what argument you may bring up they will win. Now put two of those personalities together and a competitive symmetry will exist. Sometimes these relationships result in support and motivation, but usually they end in a fight and/or hurt feelings.
I feel the pattern of rigid complementarity is the most damaging to a relationship. When one person always belittles or insults the other, resentment builds to hate or other strong emotions. To feel insignificant to a dominant partner can be very damaging the partnership. Submissive partners will eventually loose interest in trying to impress the dominant partner. It is also possible the dominant partner will get tired of pushing around the submissive partner if they aren't getting the response they want. Abusive relationships can come in verbal and physical forms, and submissive partners are usually the loser in the relationship in the long run. Extended rigid complementarity can strain relationships as partners should share the roles they play in order to feel equally important.
I think submissive symmetry could be the most damaging to the self-esteem of the individuals involved, since submissive individuals are usually looking for approval. They want their associates to feel comfortable around them by not being demanding or bringing conflict into the relationship. When two submissive individuals are caught in submissive symmetry self-doubt and irritation can arise. As each person tries not to be pushy, they can in turn be thinking very negative thoughts about the behavior they are trapped by. Why do I have to decide? What if I choose the wrong thing? Am I making them mad? I have been stuck in one of those arguments of where to eat with a friend. I usually take the submissive role since she is a dominant personality, but this particular time she didn't want to decide. While we finally did come to a decision, I felt our conversation and comfort level completely change from our submissive symmetry. Relationships form because partners feel comfortable around each other, as time goes on patterns can form which can be negative to the relationship or the self-esteem of the individuals involved. It is important to have open communication and equal treatment in a relationship in order for it to survive long term.